I went to see one of my cardiologists last week. All is well and under control. I asked him if there was anything I could do for my left arm, which is puffy and a bit purple due to poor circulation because of the larger leads in my vein. The issue is cosmetic, but it's irritating nonetheless.
He said there isn't much that can be done, but that some of his patients have found success with massage, where the massage therapist (or you can do it yourself if you want) runs their hands along the patient's arm, actually pushing the puffiness down.
He called this "intermittent massage". I heard "intimate massage".
He kept saying it, and I kept staring at him, in my head sort of frantically running through any possible way I could think of in which this kind of thing might make any difference for a puffy arm. I couldn't come up with anything. I also didn't know where I would begin to look for such a service. Did he know?, I wondered. Should I ask him? I just sat there.
Eventually, thankfully, I saw him write it down on his notepad. I said, "Oh!" and he looked at me a bit quizzically, but I left it there. I'm glad I figured it out before I hit the Yellow Pages.